I'm going through an interesting time in my life. I've always known that I wanted children, and I do have two beautiful, wonderful children, a boy and a girl, one of each! And they are the absolute light of my life. But the funny thing is, I didn't "plan" them (funny being the operative word). With Seth, he's not mine biologically, but he is in every other possible way. Lily is mine biologically, but I didn't specifically plan to have her at the time I did. Make no mistake, though, I wouldn't change any of it for anything. I am deeply in awe of how blessed I've been. But now...I WANT ANOTHER ONE!! I want another baby!! I want to buy crib bedding and search on ebay for "just one more roll" of border and I want to go by the baby section in Wal-mart and find a sleeper that I just have to have. But more than that, I want to feel that sweet soft skin next to my cheek, I want to rub my hand lightly over the soft peach-fuzz hair, I want to watch an angel sleeping in a bassinet beside my bed, I want that FEELING again. The feelings that mothers know - absolute, unconditional love for someone so small, someone so new, yet someone that you cannot imagine life without. I know, I know, I know. The baby years go by SO fast, believe me, I KNOW. They have already zoomed by with my two babies. And I know that the teenage years are less than magical and I know that potty training is no fun at all. I know that I will be tired and I will cry and pray and cry and get no sleep and cry and yell at my husband and all that stuff. But I can also see that Lily will want to help pick out his or her outfits, and Seth will be proud of him or her, and I will smile and I will feel that FEELING again. And I know he or she will grow up, but I'll never forget the FEELING and whenever times get tough and I think I can't handle another kid, I'll look at him or her and I'll remember the way I felt, just like I do with Seth and Lily. It may not be in the next year or in the next 3 years, who knows when it will be? Only God knows, (I wish he'd let me in on it, but I suspect He'll tell me when the time comes :)